Grandparent Rights to Custody & Visitation in North Carolina
Grandparents have limited but real rights to seek visitation or custody of their grandchildren in North Carolina. Timing is critical. Waiting too long can mean losing the right to make a claim at all. We help grandparents understand their options and act while those options are still open.
When Can Grandparents Seek Visitation or Custody?
Grandparents can seek visitation of grandchildren when the children’s parents are divorcing and have an open lawsuit. Grandparents can also seek custody of grandchildren who are neglected, abandoned, or in a dangerous situation. North Carolina law recognizes four specific paths for grandparents to pursue a relationship with their grandchildren:
- An open custody or divorce case involving the grandchild’s parents
- A stepparent or relative adoption where a substantial relationship already exists
- A prior custody order that has since had a substantial change in circumstances
- Evidence that the grandchild is neglected, abandoned, or in a dangerous situation
The North Carolina Statutes That Apply
Four statutes govern a grandparent’s ability to maintain an action for custody or visitation of a grandchild.
During an open custody case
Under N.C. Gen. Stat. §50-13.1(a) and §50-13.2(b1), a grandparent may intervene in an active custody or divorce case and ask the court to order visitation as part of that case.
After a stepparent or relative adoption
Under N.C. Gen. Stat. §50-13.2A, a biological grandparent may seek visitation after an adoption by a stepparent or relative, provided a substantial relationship already exists with the child.
Modifying an existing order
Under N.C. Gen. Stat. §50-13.5(j), a grandparent may seek custody or visitation rights by showing a substantial change in circumstances since the prior custody order.
Custody when parents are unfit
Under N.C. Gen. Stat. §50-13.1(a), any “other person” may file for custody, including a grandparent. Because parents have a constitutional right to raise their children, the grandparent must first prove the parents are unfit or have acted inconsistently with that right.
Standing: Where Most Grandparent Cases Are Decided
Before a North Carolina court will consider what is best for a grandchild, the grandparent must have standing, meaning a legal right to be in the case at all. Parents have a constitutionally protected right to raise their children without interference, and the General Assembly has given grandparents only the narrow statutory openings listed above. A case filed under the wrong statute or at the wrong time is dismissed without the judge ever hearing about your relationship with the child.
The single most important fact in most visitation cases is whether a custody action is already taking place between the parents. If the parents are litigating custody, or have a custody order that either of them could move to modify, a grandparent may file a motion to intervene and ask for visitation as part of that case. If the parents are together, or have separated but no custody case is pending and neither wants to file one, there is usually no door open for visitation unless the grandparent can meet the much higher custody standard. The request must be made while the custody case is ongoing, not after a final order has been entered and the parents have stopped litigating.
Seeking Custody vs. Seeking Visitation: Two Different Standards
North Carolina courts clearly distinguish custody from visitation. The answer to “which one am I asking for” determines which statute applies and how heavy the burden is.
If you are seeking visitation
You are asking for court-ordered time with a grandchild who remains in a parent’s custody. North Carolina does not allow a grandparent to sue an intact family for visitation. Visitation may be requested only within an ongoing custody dispute between the parents, after a stepparent or relative adoption where a substantial relationship existed, or by motion in a case where custody has already been determined and circumstances have changed. Once standing exists, visitation is decided on the child’s best interest, and you do not have to prove the parents are unfit.
If you are seeking custody
You are asking the court to take the child from the parents and place the child with you. You must prove by clear and convincing evidence that the parents are unfit or have acted inconsistently with their protected status as parents. Only after that finding does the court apply the best-interest standard between you and the parents. Abandonment, leaving the child in your care for an extended period, untreated addiction, incarceration, and abuse are the facts that typically satisfy the test. In practice, the standard is close to what would cause the Department of Social Services to remove a child from the parents’ care.
Once the parents have reached an agreement on custody, or the court has already decided custody, grandparents generally can no longer seek visitation on their own. Without an open case, custody is usually the only option. Learn more about child custody in North Carolina.
How to Intervene in an Existing Custody Case
A grandparent joins an existing custody case by filing a motion to intervene under Rule 24 of the Rules of Civil Procedure, attached to a proposed complaint or motion stating the visitation requested. The motion must allege the facts that give the grandparent standing, usually that a custody action is pending between the parents and that the grandparent has a substantial relationship with the child. If the court allows intervention, the grandparent becomes a party, may participate in discovery and mediation, and presents evidence at the custody hearing. The court then decides whether grandparent visitation serves the child’s best interest and, if so, sets a schedule that fits around the parents’ time.
Grandparents who already have the child living with them, or who have had the child for months while a parent was absent, are in a different position. They should consider filing their own custody complaint rather than waiting for the parents to start a case. The facts that support standing for custody, such as a parent’s voluntary relinquishment of care, weaken over time if the parent resumes contact.
What the Statutes Say
In plain terms: if your grandchild’s parents have an open lawsuit in court, you can file to intervene in the case and seek visitation. The court applies a best-interest-of-the-child standard to decide whether you should have visitation and how often. Below is the relevant statutory language.
“Any parent, relative, or other person, agency, organization or institution claiming the right to custody of a minor child may institute an action or proceeding for the custody of such child, as hereinafter provided.”N.C. Gen. Stat. §50-13.1(a)
“An order for custody of a minor child may provide visitation rights for any grandparent of the child as the court, in its discretion, deems appropriate. As used in this subsection, ‘grandparent’ includes a biological grandparent of a child adopted by a stepparent or a relative of the child where a substantial relationship exists between the grandparent and the child.”N.C. Gen. Stat. §50-13.2(b1)
“A biological grandparent may institute an action or proceeding for visitation rights with a child adopted by a stepparent or a relative of the child where a substantial relationship exists between the grandparent and the child. Under no circumstances shall a biological grandparent of a child adopted by adoptive parents, neither of whom is related to the child and where parental rights of both biological parents have been terminated, be entitled to visitation rights. A court may award visitation rights if it determines that visitation is in the best interest of the child.”N.C. Gen. Stat. §50-13.2A
“In any action in which the custody of a minor child has been determined, upon a motion in the cause and a showing of changed circumstances pursuant to G.S. 50-13.7, the grandparents of the child are entitled to such custody or visitation rights as the court, in its discretion, deems appropriate.”N.C. Gen. Stat. §50-13.5(j)
Custody, Guardianship or Adoption?
Grandparents who are already raising a grandchild often ask for “custody” when a different tool fits better, and the choice affects everything from school enrollment to Medicaid.
Custody order
A custody order under Chapter 50 gives you decision-making authority and physical custody while the parents remain parents. It is the right choice when a parent is alive and may resume care.
Guardianship
Guardianship through the Clerk of Superior Court is used when both parents have died or when the child has money that needs a guardian of the estate. See our guardianship page.
Adoption
Adoption permanently ends the parents’ rights and makes you the legal parent. It is the most secure option and the hardest to obtain over a parent’s objection. See adoption in North Carolina.
When the Department of Social Services has removed a child from the parents, the rules change again. Grandparents can seek placement and custody inside the juvenile case, and moving quickly matters. Our article on DSS, custody and your children explains how those cases work.
What Grandparents Should Gather
- A timeline of your involvement: how often you have cared for the child, overnight stays, school pickups, medical appointments and holidays
- Evidence of the parents’ situation: substance abuse, incarceration, mental health crises, unstable housing or abandonment, documented rather than described
- Any existing custody order or pending case between the parents, because your standing to intervene depends on it
- Records showing the child’s routine and stability in your home: school enrollment, medical providers, activities
- Texts, emails or messages in which a parent asked you to care for the child or acknowledged your role
- A realistic budget; grandparents raising grandchildren may qualify for child support from the parents and, in some cases, public benefits for the child
Grandparents’ Rights FAQs
Do grandparents have visitation rights in North Carolina?
Maybe. North Carolina grandparents have limited rights to seek visitation, and timing is critical, waiting too long before making your move can mean losing the right to make a claim at all. Whether you qualify depends on whether there is an open custody case, a qualifying adoption, or a prior order that can be modified.
What is the difference between grandparent visitation and grandparent custody?
Visitation is generally available only while a custody case involving the grandchild’s parents remains open. Custody is a much higher bar, typically requiring a showing that the parents have abandoned the child or that the child is being severely neglected.
Can grandparents get visitation after a stepparent or relative adoption?
Yes, in certain circumstances. A biological grandparent may seek visitation after a stepparent or relative adoption if a substantial relationship with the child already exists. This right does not apply when unrelated adoptive parents have adopted a child whose biological parents’ rights were both terminated.
How do I seek custody as a grandparent?
Without an open custody case, custody is generally the only path available, and you must show that the parents have abandoned the child or that the child is being severely neglected. An experienced family law attorney can help you evaluate whether your situation meets this standard.
Is there a time limit for grandparents to request visitation?
Yes. Grandparents generally must seek visitation while a custody case is still open. Once the parents reach a custody agreement or the court enters a final custody order, the window to intervene typically closes. Contact us as soon as you anticipate a custody or divorce case so you do not lose your opportunity.
Can grandparents get custody if the parents are unfit?
Yes. A grandparent, like any non-parent, can be awarded custody by showing that the parents have acted inconsistently with their constitutionally protected status as parents, for example through abandonment, neglect, or leaving the child in the grandparent’s care for an extended period, and that custody with the grandparent is in the child’s best interests. This is a higher bar than the best-interests test that applies between two parents, and the evidence has to be specific.
Do grandparents have to pay for a lawyer for the grandchild?
Not usually. If the court appoints a guardian ad litem or attorney for the child, the fee is allocated between the parties as the court decides. In DSS cases the child’s guardian ad litem is provided by the state.
Can a parent cut off contact with grandparents after a divorce?
If the parents are intact and there is no custody case, yes; North Carolina does not give grandparents a right to visit over the objection of parents in an intact family. Once there is a custody dispute between the parents, or a parent has died or is unfit, grandparents gain standing to ask the court for visitation, and the court can order it if it is in the child’s best interests and does not interfere with the parent-child relationship.
Do grandparents have automatic rights in North Carolina?
No. Grandparents have no automatic right to custody or visitation. Any right has to be established through one of the statutory paths described on this page, and the court must find that standing exists before it considers the child’s best interest.
Can grandparents get visitation if the parents are still together?
Almost never. North Carolina does not allow a grandparent to sue an intact family for visitation. A custody dispute between the parents, a stepparent or relative adoption, or a prior custody order that can be modified is required before a grandparent has standing to ask.
What counts as acting “inconsistently with parental rights”?
Conduct that shows a parent has set aside the role of parent: abandoning the child, leaving the child with someone else to raise for an extended period without maintaining a parental role, or being found unfit because of abuse or neglect. A parent who is struggling but still involved usually does not meet this standard.
My grandchild lived with me for a year and now the parent wants the child back. What can I do?
File for custody promptly. A parent who voluntarily left the child in your care for an extended period without maintaining a parental role may be found to have acted inconsistently with parental rights, which gives you standing. Waiting while the parent reestablishes contact weakens that argument with every week that passes.
Can I get visitation if my child died and the other parent cut me off?
Only if one of the statutory openings applies. If the surviving parent remarries and the stepparent adopts the child, G.S. 50-13.2A allows a biological grandparent with a substantial relationship to seek visitation. Otherwise, with no custody case pending and the family intact, North Carolina courts have generally held there is no standing for visitation. This is one of the hardest situations in grandparent law, and it is worth a consultation to see whether any door is open.
What is a “substantial relationship” with the grandchild?
Regular, meaningful contact over time: frequent visits, overnights, caregiving, involvement in school and medical care, and a bond the child recognizes. Occasional holiday visits are usually not enough. The timeline and records described in the checklist above are how you prove it.
Do I have to go through mediation?
Usually, yes. Once you are a party to a custody case in North Carolina, the court’s custody mediation program applies to you as it does to the parents, unless the court waives it. Many grandparent visitation schedules are settled in mediation without a hearing.
Will filing make things worse with my child?
It can, and we tell every grandparent that plainly. Parents often respond to a filing by cutting off contact, at least for a while. That is a reason to try a direct conversation or a mediated agreement first when the situation allows it, and a reason to make sure your filing is strong enough to succeed if you do go forward. It is not a reason to wait past the point where you lose standing.
Related Reading
Protect Your Relationship With Your Grandchildren
If you are a grandparent concerned about maintaining a close relationship with your grandchildren, contact us early so you can make an informed decision about your next steps.