Does Bad Behavior Affect Who Gets What in a North Carolina Divorce?
Many people assume a judge will give them more of the property because of how their spouse behaved. A March 2026 North Carolina Court of Appeals decision is a reminder that property division does not work that way.
An Unequal Split, Reversed
In Wheeler v. Wheeler, decided March 4, 2026, a trial court divided the marital property unequally. One of its stated reasons was the other spouse’s excessive drinking, domestic violence, taking of identification and bank cards, and a threat to kill.
The Court of Appeals held that the trial court should not have considered those things. They did not relate to the economic condition of the marriage, so they had no place in dividing property. Because the court could not tell how much weight that reason carried, it set the order aside and sent the case back.
Where Misconduct Counts and Where It Does Not
Property division. Only economic misconduct matters. Wasting, hiding, selling off or running down marital assets can justify an unequal split. Drinking, cruelty and infidelity by themselves cannot.
Alimony. Marital misconduct is a factor the court must consider, and an affair can decide whether alimony is awarded at all.
Custody. A parent’s conduct matters when it affects the child. A court must make specific findings about domestic violence when there is evidence of it.
Safety. Threats and violence are grounds for a domestic violence protective order, which is a separate case from the divorce.
What This Means for You
If your spouse behaved badly
- Raise it in the claims where it counts: alimony, custody and protective orders
- For property, focus on money: spending on an affair, gambling, hidden accounts, assets sold or neglected
- Keep records of the financial harm
If you are accused of misconduct
- It does not automatically cost you property
- It can still affect alimony and custody
- An order that relies on non-economic misconduct to divide property can be challenged
A note for military families. The same decision involved a military Survivor Benefit Plan. The Court of Appeals said no North Carolina appellate court has yet settled how that benefit fits into property division, and told the trial court to hold a hearing on how to classify, value and distribute it. If a military pension is part of your case, that question is open.
Misconduct and Property FAQs
Will I get more property because my spouse cheated?
Not for that reason alone. Adultery is not a factor in dividing property in North Carolina. Money spent on the affair can be, and adultery is highly relevant to alimony.
What counts as economic misconduct?
Conduct that reduces what there is to divide: wasting or hiding assets, running up debt for non-marital purposes, selling property below value, or letting assets lose value after separation.
Does domestic violence affect the divorce at all?
Yes, in important ways. It can support a protective order, it must be addressed in a custody decision, and it can be considered as marital misconduct in alimony. It is just not a reason to divide property unequally.
Wondering How Conduct Affects Your Case?
The same facts can matter a great deal in one claim and not at all in another. We can help you put them where they count.
Managing Partner and Co-Founder, McIlveen Family Law Firm. Angela is a Board Certified Specialist in Family Law, certified by the North Carolina State Bar Board of Legal Specialization, and an experienced family law trial attorney who represents clients across North Carolina. She personally reviewed this page for legal accuracy.
